The Self

Quotes from The Last Broken Home concerning the self; who we are, who we’re not, and why we are what we are.


“When a man throws feces, we give him help.  When he throws insults, we give him nothing.  Neither behavior is the action of an emotionally healthy individual.”

Explaining Teen Depression: The Effect of Broken Homes, pt. II

“We are not born with low self-esteem, with fears and anxieties, with anger or envy.  We learn these things.  It may have been from a parent, or guardian.  It may have been friends.  It may have been a total stranger.  However we acquired these habits, they have surely become habits.  They’ve become a part of who we are, of who we believe ourselves to be.”

– Explaining Teen Depression: The Effect of Broken Homes, pt. II

“When you are anything less than strong internally, you leave yourself at the whim of whatever may befall you in life.  And something will surely befall you, be it the loss of a job, a spouse, a life, or whatever else.  When you are less than strong internally, expect sadness, expect that anything at any time may make you as I was then.  Your self-esteem, your beliefs, your expectations are a grenade with the pin pulled.”

The Single Greatest Reason You Are Destined for Depression

“The poorly built house has to fall eventually.  It may weather a storm, or two, or three, but each is as the end of the world, and there’s always a stronger storm to come.”

– The Single Greatest Reason You Are Destined for Depression

“You must have standards for how people treat you in life.  You must stand up for what you deserve and are owed.  You must stand up for yourself.  Because no one will respect someone who doesn’t respect himself.”

How “Go F*** Yourself” Became My New Favorite Greeting

“The reality is, that in this world the strong do eclipse the weak; and those with the confidence to enforce their standards will forever be those who ensure others live by them.  And those too meek, too passive, too weak to protect themselves, their interests, will always be the ones with neither left to protect.

– How “Go F*** Yourself” Became My New Favorite Greeting

“So often in life, those people we fear are those we have no reason to fear.  People who can’t hurt us.  People who can’t affect us.  People no different than any other, no better than any other – who we give power over our selves, over our emotions – because we fear them.  Strangers we give everything, because we think they mean something.”

The Fear of People…That Ends Here

“Think of anyone or any situation with others that scares you.  These people have no power over you but the power you give them.  They hold no sway over you but the sway you allow.  they have no ability to affect you but the ability you gift them.  They are nobody, until you make of them – in your mind – somebody.  Someone to be afraid of or cower to.  Someone to cry over, or pine for.  Someone to fear.  As if you were weak.  As if you had no control.  As if you were the nobody.”

– The Fear of People…That Ends Here

“When it comes to your efforts and your results, one you control and one you do not.  One is worth your concern and one is not.  One is actually representative of who you are and one will never be.”

The “I Don’t Give a Cr@p” Method to Test Anxiety

“Effort is a far more predictive measure of success in life than any red mark on a paper from high school.”

– The “I Don’t Give a Cr@p” Method to Test Anxiety

“But as children mature – as they grow and learn and become one of “us” – an adult, a grown-up, a functioning member of the mass of society – their child-like bravery, and courage, and daring – their eagerness to experiment and their confidence in being the center of attention – disappears.  Quickly.  It doesn’t happen naturally (as in inevitably) but socially – through their inclusion in a family within a culture, and a culture within a society, and a society that depends upon discipline and order to function in a predictable and productive manner.  It happens bit-by-bit, day-by-day, until they become as the rest of us are: mostly “well behaved”, disciplined, conditioned.”

How Living at the Edge of My Comfort Zone, The Tip of My Fears Led Me to Wandering the Sahara

“You need to get mad.  You need to get angry.  Your situation needs to piss you the fuck off.  Because if there’s anything in life worth getting angry about, getting pissed about, it’s the reality that you are not who you are capable of being; that you’re not who you’re meant to be.”

I’m Highly Suggesting You Get Pretty Effing P***ed Off (For Your Own Good)

“Yell if you need to, and cry if you want.  But cry till it hurts; till the anger is so great that it causes in you a change.  Till the pain is so much that your mind says: “Fuck this.  Never again.”  Cry till your mind realizes that failing yourself again is far more painful than whatever pain may come from doing what’s right.”

– I’m Highly Suggesting You Get Pretty Effing P***ed Off (For Your Own Good)

“Something odd happens when you begin to see what in you is TRULY you: That is…you begin to see what in you is NOT you.  You begin to see that all that you thought you could not control are in fact what few things in life you can control.  You begin to realize the great many ways by which our lives, and selves, and pasts, and futures are indeed so very random, and in the greatest way, arbitrary.  How though you may be able to change this or that thing which disappoints you – your skill in whatever hobby, your fit in whatever clothes, those you surround yourself with, and those you include in your life – that those things are actually very little of the totality of your life, of who you are and have become; that in reality there exists so much in you that is not of you.  Not something you planned.  Not something you chose.  Not something you desired, nor something you deserved even.”

It May Be Puke-Inducingly Cliche, But We Are All The Same

“You see that much of what you enjoy and are proud of in you was, to the greatest extent, decided not by your sole efforts or intentions, but by your birth and birth alone, and by all that’s resulted from that singular event onwards.  You see that, in a way, you’re not as special as you think.  You’re not as much a result of your efforts as you imagine.  Not as unique.  Not different at all.”

– It May Be Puke-Inducingly Cliche, But We Are All The Same

“More and more I look at the lives of others here and around the world and realize that so much of what we call our lives and our selves are given to us, forced upon us, and decided for us.  More and more I look around and see that so little of us is from us; that all I consider to be My Self and My Life are only my own because I was born “Adam” in this place, in this time, and not some other person, in some other place and time.”

– It May Be Puke-Inducingly Cliche, But We Are All The Same

Nothing separates you from the man born on the same day as you, on the other side of the world from you, except the womb and place from which you came, and from those few differences have come all differences that exist now – that allow you to live you life and may prevent him from living the same.”

– It May Be Puke-Inducingly Cliche, But We Are All The Same

“All that separates “You” – your style, your beliefs, and your personality – from that of the young kid living in a shack somewhere – barefoot, uneducated, and starving – is that you are here and he is there.  For if you had been born to his same parents, and his same family, and his same society, in his same culture – if you had lived his same experiences, and shared in his same lessons, you would share his same thoughts, you would share his same life, you would be him.  Because you are who you are.  But could have been any other.”

– It May Be Puke-Inducingly Cliche, But We Are All The Same

“That one person grew up on one rock that juts the sea and you another does not make you different.”

– It May Be Puke-Inducingly Cliche, But We Are All The Same

“When you become one of The Group, you cease to be an individual.  You lose control of your Self.  You surrender your will to the will of the mob, and give control of your actions to the whims of them – to the “friends” whose acceptance you’re so desperate to win, and the camaraderie you’re so desperate to feel.  And suddenly the group’s beliefs are your beliefs, their actions your actions, and their hatred your hatred.”

When You Realize Your Friends Are Nazis, and You’re a Bully…

“Our actions today and our behaviors today are another step towards the selves of our future – another day towards that end we can’t see now, nor might believe now.  But they also make up the reality of who we are right now.  And so long as we are less than we are capable, we keep open the possibility that tomorrow we will be even less than we are today.”

I’m Going Back in Time to Save the World (I Just Need a Bag Lunch)

“Lost in the science that explains our problems as the result of whatever genes, or the excuses that explain our sad lives as the product of whatever misfortune, is the reality that every life can go any way; that nothing is predetermined.  And in the decisions we make everyday lies the seeds of our later selves – that we’re forgiving rather than hating, loving rather than indifferent, strong through heart and mind and will, rather than through fear, and manipulation, and violence.”

– I’m Going Back in Time to Save the World (I Just Need a Bag Lunch)

“Amongst us now walk both the greatness of tomorrow, as well as the evil of tomorrow, and that within each of us is the potential to become either – should we let ourselves be controlled by our lesser feelings, or instead control ourselves through our greater hopes.”

– I’m Going Back in Time to Save the World (I Just Need a Bag Lunch)

“We are – however we are, and with whatever we’re doing – creating our future every day.  Where does your arrow point, as you are now?  To what does it point?  Where will you be?  How will you be?  Who will you be?”

– I’m Pretty Much Almost Kinda Positive Maybe I Can Predict the Future, Definitely

“I did everything as I was supposed to, and never as I wanted to.”

“In our smallest actions are proof of our deepest held ideals, and those who let even the most inconsequential of things manipulate their behavior and their desires, are surely those who will let life’s more difficult challenges control them.”

“It was like a horrible disease – not just a desire, but a need to avoid trouble, to fly-right, to be what others perceived as good, and to be the Me others perceived as Me.  It was a total fear of what may happen if I did something – anything – against the norm or against the “rules”, of getting into any kind of trouble, and any amount of trouble.  It was my tendency to let others control my behavior –  whether a person, a group, or society in general – to impose their view of the world  above my own, and their priorities in the world before my own.  The desire to be what others expected of me.  The fear of being the center of any negative attention or social pressure.”

“Every day, we surrender our enjoyment and desires to shit we are told, and little words on signs.   Every day, we avoid experiencing what we want because of what we are taught to fear.  Every day we’re told to ignore our desires and needs through threat of punishment which does not exist or does not matter.  Every day we put the interests of others above ourselves.  In the smallest of ways.  In the subtlest of ways.”

“Those with true self esteem hold their ideals and pleasures above all others’.  They hold what they want as a value more important than what others want of them.”

“While the world obeys signs and rules, the strong do what they want.  While others put their interests in the hands of others, the strong take their interests in their own hands.  While others submit their ideals to the world, the strong hold their ideals as indivisible.”

“That so long as you live, never feel guilt for doing as you please and as you want.  Never surrender your desires to the imagined or threatened consequences of another’s “rules”.  Never apologize for being your Self, so long as you do no harm in being it.”

“A rule not written is a suggestion.   And suggestions don’t mean anything to me when what I want means more.”

You are your own savior.  You are the hero of your story.  You are the catalyst you’ve spent a lifetime searching for, waiting for, praying for.”

– This Blog is [Mental] Masturbation

“It’s that big goals are big things. And the magnitude of the challenges or achievements that would truly change your life are so often greater than you’ve ever thought before, or would ever care to imagine now.”

– The Only 1% in the World We Should Give a Damn About

“Every person who marches into battle – who lifts their weapon and fires it at another – does so knowing this: That they will sacrifice their lives, or they will sacrifice their Selves.”

– Your Standard, Cliche Memorial Day Post (Or Not…)

He represented the idea that it was possible to be different and not care, not give a shit, not spend one second wondering what people think of you or say about you.”

What [Marilyn Manson] Can Teach You About Being Yourself

“What can Marilyn Manson teach you about being your Self?  That being different is okay.  That being different is a sign of strength.  That being different – though others may not accept you or like you – will forever be more important than being just another faceless person in the crowd.”

What [Marilyn Manson] Can Teach You About Being Yourself

“I think it’s something to look up to, and aspire towards.  Not their actions necessarily, but their ideals.  Not their choices, maybe, but their beliefs.  Because these women clearly don’t give a shit what others think of them.  They don’t care.  They don’t care what others say about them, or think about them, or believe about them.  They don’t care that their family knows.  They don’t care that their friends know.  They don’t care that every person they have met or will ever meet needn’t do more than pop their name into Google to see them as any other person would only be horrified to be seen by a stranger.”

What a [Pornstar] Can Teach You About Being Yourself

“The will of a few who possess strength, shape the behaviors of the many who do not.”

– What a [Druglord] Can Teach You About Being Yourself

“You either control or are controlled.”

What a [Druglord] Can Teach You About Being Yourself

“Those who achieve in life are those willing to step forward when everyone else toes the line; those willing to speak their mind when everyone else looks around silently; those willing to lead when others will only follow.”

What a [Dictator] Can Teach You About Being Yourself”

“We have to be able to be the first to speak up.  The first to stand up.  The first to march.  We have to be willing to risk that our revolution is a solo revolution; that with our opinions, and beliefs, and personality, we are The Only.”

What a [Dictator] Can Teach You About Being Yourself”

“Being your best Self, it’s not something to be put off till X or Y future time.  It’s not something to be put off till you have one thing or another you think you’re missing.  It’s not something to be put off at all.”

What a [Death Row Inmate] Can Teach You About Being Yourself

“It’s something you won’t hear in a great many self-help sites.  But the simple truth is that losers do exist.  Of course they exist.  We’ve all met them.  And beneath the candy-coated ideals that we’re all wonderful, and lovable, and deserving of only the best, is the fact that some are more so than others, and therefore that some are less so than the rest.  That some are funnier, stronger, more confident, more attractive.  That some are worth more, wanted more, are more.  That some are better.”

A Loser at 20, is a Loser at 40

“In the strictest evolutionary sense – if no woman will have him, if no woman of all he’s seen and all he’s met so far will have him, then there is no reason for the next girl to have him – to risk her genes combining with his, to risk her looks, her value, 9 months of pain, and 18 years of responsibilities – to raise a child that would only likely be just as lame as him.  Because – in the genetic sense – a man who can’t get a girl is no man at all.  It means his name will die with him.  It means he has no value.  It means his genes will and should be weeded out as inferior, when the a gene’s only purpose is to spread and live on.  It means he is – to our species, and to the woman in front of him – worthless.”

A Loser at 20, is a Loser at 40

How you are now, is how you remain, when you do nothing to fix it.  And who you are now, is who you will be, when you do nothing to change it.  That a loser at 15 is a loser at 20.  And a loser at 20 is a loser at 40.  And a loser at 40 is a loser at 80.  And if you’re a loser today – right now – and do nothing, you will die one too.  It won’t change.  It won’t get better.  Life won’t improve at all.  Till you yourself do.”

A Loser at 20, is a Loser at 40

“Who you want to be is who you must become to get what you now want.  And who you are now is what you must change to end the life you now hate.”

A Loser at 20, is a Loser at 40

“You are never absent a purpose.  Your purpose is You.  It’s always you.  Whatever that may involve, and whatever that may mean.”

Dude, You Couldn’t Be Purposeless If You Tried…

“If there’s one thing that will last your lifetime…it’s You.  YOU will last your lifetime.  So work on your Self.”

Dude, You Couldn’t Be Purposeless If You Tried…

“Your purpose is not a job anyway.  It’s not a career, not an endeavor, not a goal.  It’s not a position, a possession, an achievement, or an accomplishment.  It’s your life.  Your life is purpose enough.  Your Self is purpose enough.  And so long as you have the time and ability to improve it, you have the duty and responsibility to do so as well.”

Dude, You Couldn’t Be Purposeless If You Tried…

“We all have some part of us that we keep to ourselves.  Some part that’s most ourselves – that no one sees.”

You’ve Never Known a Person in Your Life, And You May Never Too


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