This is part #10, the very last in our 30-day series on explaining how we did and do become our Selves.
If you read the last article, maybe that’s kinda surprising. Because the last one, in many ways, seemed like the logical conclusion to this sweet, sweet series.
I mean, the thing was inspiring and uplifting, with a damned impressive call to action, and had just enough freaking desperation and anger even to maybe get a dude or lady up and doing something in life.
But here’s the thing…
Did you actually do something after reading it? Did you live any better that day? Did you try something new?
Did you start to make the relationships that would make your life happier? Did you try to smooth the relationships that have long made your life difficult?
Did you begin to disconnect your Self from some of the things that have held back your Self? Did you cut through some of the crap that would reveal your Self?
Did you do or start anything at all that would make You better than you were before you had found this stuff?
That’s why this is the last in the series.
Because for most people, what we call “self help” is nothing more than mental masturbation. It’s some person, feeling kinda bad, reading something awesome for nothing more than the momentary high of feeling hopeful for once, or happy for once, when normally they feel neither.
It’s someone reading of the successes of others, and saying “Damn. I can too!”, until the next morning – when they wake and once more believe they can’t.
It’s someone who talks a big game – about improving themselves, about becoming a better person for themselves – yet never really doing either.
Because they don’t change. Despite all the reading. Despite all the help. Despite all the “inspiration”.
And so, I wanna conclude this awesome, so awesome 10 part course on how you did and do become your self, not with something inspiring and beautiful – which you’d just read, enjoy, and forget about in 10 minutes – but something different…
Something sobering. Something painful. Something that reminds you that this stuff isn’t a joke, or just some words on a screen.
That improving yourself and getting over all the crap that’s held you back to date – family, friends, whatever – is and has always been…serious. It’s important. It’s your freaking life.
It isn’t just “ah, pretty cool” to be a little more independent, a little freer, a little better. It’s imperative.
It isn’t just “yeah I guess I’ll try” to be and become more confident, and centered, and strong. It’s your freaking duty.
It isn’t just something to think about from time to time. It’s everything.
Because how you are now, is how you remain, when you do nothing to fix it. And who you are now, is who you will be, when you do nothing to change it.
If you’re depressed, and sad, and hopeless now, what do you expect to think when you’re old?
If you’re wounded, and bitter, hateful now, how do you expect to feel when you’re old?
If you are less than your best Self now, who do you expect you will be when you’re old?
The answer’s the very same.
You will be no different.
Because you did nothing to change it. Because you did nothing to improve your Self. Because you did nothing.
In the simplest, most crude, most insulting terms:
A loser at 15 is a loser at 20. A loser at 20 is a loser at 40. A loser at 40 is a loser at 80.
Learning how to deal with life and how to make your life changes everything. Removing the stuff of you that hinders you changes everything. Improving your Self changes everything.
And so, ask yourself – every day – what did I do today to improve my Self?
What did I do differently today than I have all my life? What little thing – any thing – did I change so as to make me better in those areas of my life that most fuel the same old me I’ve grown to hate or whatever? What did I do bravely? What temptation did I ignore? What influences did I cut out? For what or who did I have more patience, and for what too little?
Do I rest my head tonight a better person than I rose as?
Ask yourself these questions tonight – for the first time, for the rest of your life – and don’t let one more day go by where you have no answer, or one that just doesn’t, or shouldn’t, satisfy you.
That’s all for this series on explaining what you have and do become. I seriously appreciate every one read. I know I can be wordy sometimes (my bad), but I think becoming a better person is worth the 10 minutes. Hopefully you’ve enjoyed them and stick around at The Last Broken Home for the awesome stuff to come.